15.10.19

Psychedelics

My journey with psychedelics started with Disney. You cannot watch "The three caballeros" and not go on a trip. That movie is like a k hole acid fever dream. The first time I ever actually went on a psychedelic trip was when I was 16 and I took salvia. Salvia!! Of all things. Oh - my - friggin - god. Literally never even smoked weed before and here I was, floating around in the world of sound waves. Sound waves of all shapes, sizes, and formations. I was a sound wave too! Beautiful colors floating in a sea of darkness. I thought I was wiping away the dream, like dusting pixels off with my arms, and found myself lying down on the couch. I must have hated real life because I became an animator after that. I tried to recreate what I saw and I learnt flash and made this crude, colourful thing about a couch that swallowed you and sent you to couch world. I wasn't very interested in doing salvia again and I haven't done it since.



Maybe a year after that I did shrooms at a friends house and cried for a couple hours and then touched my hair for the next couple hours but I didn't get any fun visuals or life changing inspiration. Up till about 26 I was never really interested much in experimenting with psychedelics. It honestly came as a surprise that when I started releasing games people saw the psychedelic influences and called me on it. I hardly even done psychedelics up until then, only those 2 times! I thought all my inspiration came from drawing plants, seashells, ocean and cloud formations on Vancouver Island. I got super interested in meditation for a while. I used to do this ritual where I'd fill a glass with water and put it in the sun, I'd meditate while watching it for like an hour then drink the water. The water always tasted so good! I started writing down as many dreams as I could remember. Most of my inspirations came from meditating and dreaming at that time, also from fractal zooms and math documentaries because I was learning how to code.
SooOOoo
I was surprised but not THAT surprised, like, my work is trippy af I get it. I was surprised at how positive everyone seemed to be about it though, like finally someone not afraid to admit they see trippy shit and to make art about it. People would comment "I see shit like this when I'm high on acid!!"
So the first time I did acid.... was when I was 26. My programmer gave me a tab at a time I was staying at my friends tiny house while they were away in Morocco. Before my friend left, they were showing me around the house and they mentioned that gnomes lived there too but they were harmless and they would prank me but I should just be cool with them. Like.... okaaaaayyyy whatever bro. So this tiny house was actually 2 (short) stories and in the middle of the city of Montreal along the canal. It felt like a gnome house, it was such a gnome house. I loved that house! It was full of strange musical instruments. I was obsessed with fibre optic plastic plants at that time (?!) and I had all these bright glowing pink flowers all over the kitchen. I also had a tonne of fruit, so that place was like a playground once the acid kicked in. We went for a walk and we came across a white horse pulling a carriage (because its Old Montreal and they do shit like that). The owner offered us to feed the horse a carrot!!!!!!!!! I died. I was terrified and the horse saw that I was terrified and that was a huge moment for me. I felt like I was communicating with animals as equals for the first time in my life.
The carriage actually took us home lol. My friend played the guitar and I closed my eyes and saw beautiful shapes and everything was lovely.
After that night I was able to humor the idea that gnomes were actually real in this tiny house and were pranking me occasionally. Also a convenient excuse for misplacing stuff.







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